So hypothetically speaking its halloweekend, and one of ur good friend’s bdays is the 30th so she throws a major rager, and you get all gussied up as sexy big titty (im talking huge knockers, mondo hubbawubba chichis) witch in this sexy lil body con dress and witch accessories of course. so plane flier picks u up bc u both decided u wood stay at the house bc u both wanted to get fr*cked up, and tod cant drive yet (crying face emoji) so u wood b unable to safely get back home (whimpers). anyway u both go and pick up plane fliers coworker/friend powerfully cute, and yall are on the way!
Yall make it to the party and park kinda far, and some dude is like creepy to powerfully cute. so plane fliers like, speed on gorls we gettin to bday girls house. so youre walking and meet up with alternative tree, thiccness, cody fern look alike, and sweet little pretty. so you guys do walksies and make it to the party. the house is three floors, with the basement being like ground level in the backyard, but underground in the front yard if that makes sense, but regardless yall have to go downstairs to be in the backyard where the party is really hoppin. and so you meet up with pours too much vodka (we’ll c this l8r) and she gives plane flier a pink shirt bc they are Barbie and Ken (cute alert! but plane is gay heheh which has maybe been mentioned somewhere). you go downstairs and pours too much vodka, starts the night by pouring everyone a “shot” of vodka,,, yeah okay… but her brother is cute asf, amd single so one(ish) shot in, you go and try and talk coherently to him (trrrrry bein operative word here heh) and he’s very attentive and cool and likes classic rock and Greta Van Fleet but he ends up having to get out of there (sad eyes).
By this point ur friends Cal and Saphira show up with Kai and these ladies is being the sanderson sisters, very cute and powerful. one thing to note here is that saphira is a self care queen on lexapro, so she must stay sober. But after greta van fleet fan leaves your first nip slip of the night happens, which of course is smtg u warned wood happen, but saphira is there to save you. So u get like another shot ish and begin talking with plane flier saphira, cal, kai, and plane flier’s cr*sh, bff of bday gorl, math teacher son but funny. at this point tho u only want to eat cheeto puffs, but u spill three on the ground and are v sad for a hot min.
you go back into the basement and corner cody fern look alike, who is fluent in spanish and like you need to practice ur spanish but he’s zooted af and nobody else really understands spanish around you but that doesnt matter bc its time to take a shot. at this point u kinda remember (and kinda dont) that you also had a jello shot at ur cousin’s house w ur brother while ur mom stood kinda disappointed (sowwy momby) but thats fine because u ate some food right?
yeah sure you did. you have also finished a silly and goofy smirnoff ice to go with the undetermined (probs 6) amount of shots u’ve had, heheh. so saphira helps u up the stairs and tod is there and there are cookies and cupcakes and you eat a cookie but it’s like kinda hard, and sober that’s like ur preferred, but drunk it is makin u sad eyes. then u eat a cupcake and u realize it’s a red velvet cupcake which u dont like even tho it’s literally like special chocolate or smtg to do with chocolate. but another thing you realize is that u might be feelin a little sicksies rn hah. so saphira takes u to go sit down and tod sits with yall and youre just sitting and thinking like el oh el im drunksies, and theyre talkin and then ur like hmmm maybe imma vom rn. so u tell saphira.
immediately she gets u up, and i think shes about to take me upstairs to the third floor bathroom from the second floor,,, but there’s no way i can get up the stairs haheheh. so we go out the front door instead and immediately im squattin and vomiting in front of birthday gorls front door. so remember how u said u ate food. the food in question was actually tator tots and eggs. so ig that’s not really a meal,,, which is news to me. but vomiting is making you feel much better, but also super skinny as well, so in and out of spanish u r like “lol soy flacca,,, ahahah im sosoooo skinny” but it’s fine. by this point ur tits r both outside of the dress, swinging pendulum udders hehehehehh oopsies. and saphira and powerfully cute are rubbing ur back and trying to help u, and plane flier is lik “u really thought u ate” (tiktok stan) on a loop. u get vom in ur awesome ded couple necklace, and vomit all over ur hands, and as it turns out, ur suede witch bootie heels or whatever.
So there’s a point when u can no longer vomit because u were so silly and didnt eat enough stuff to throw up,,, in a completely silly way. and as Jesus was helped by simon on his way to be crucified, so were you taken by a group of close friends and one stranger helped down the stairs barely conscious and into a bed in the basement. plane flier and powerfully cute help you out of ur dress even tho ur tits been out for the whole time u vomited lol. and then u r asleep and somehow there’s bread that’s on the floor on top of some crackers, the floor in question is concrete and covered in sand and dirt. there’s also some electrolyte water for you to drink, as well as regular water, but frankly u just need to finish ur task on hayday. and you do, bc ur a boss ass bitch. then u sleep a bit i think, and pours too much vodka comes and spoons you which is very cool bc heart eyes human contact, but then you have to piss again,, so u escape and struggle up the stairs into the bathroom, and finally wasf vom off of ur hands, but u still feel so sick and it’s like 2:40 in the morning so you go back downstairs to drink, and fall asleep while plane flier and tod try to convince pours too much vodka that she doesn’t need to come downstairs and take another nap with u because there’s no way she can get back up the stairs. laughs in a kittenly way hehe.
And i think before u vomited powerfully cute helped u use the bathroom but honestlyi was so fucked up i cant believe im alive rn, the next day plane flier was telling me that they all thought i had alcohol poisoning, and that they might have to try and get me to the hospital,,, cringe alert! but it’s fine. next time i will behave and will not have that many shots, or any weed, which is just another silly thing i did that night but i barely remember hehehe bc i was extremely fucked up and sloppy and not in the funny and cute way, but in the silly and worrying way. anyway ended up having a sick feeling all halloween (duh) but i had to go out to eat for another bday and kinda thought i wood maybe do diesies. but i didnt. anyway, if hypothetically this hypothetical situation happened to you would you complete your hayday derby task, or are you a coward?
hypothetically speaking 